Boss and I are exhausted!
We had a very busy day today. For some reason I never sleep well on Friday night. All that I can ‘fess up to (because sadly that is all there is to ‘fess up to) is watching VH1 Top 100 songs from the 80’s until 10 pm and then tossing and turning all night. I think I fear that I will not wake up for masters and then have to swim (gasp) alone.
There is nothing worse than that.
So I wake up at 6 am feeling like I have been rolled over. But this morning I knew better than to make last week’s mistake of not having coffee before the swim (eek!). I had Starbuck’s Via courtesy of Colleen from Seattle. May I just say that I think I am a fan? It is actually not that bad. In fact, I think I like it better than I like their brewed coffee.
Masters was so low key today. Gone are the mega mixed up sets that last the full 90 minutes. They have been replaced by taper workouts. Let me say in addition to the instant coffee I am also a big fan of state meet taper workouts. I’m not doing the state meet but I’ll take the opportunity to go short, fast with tons of rest. For example, today we did 40 x 25. The first 20 on the :25 and the last 20 on the :30. And only sprinting the odds. You know what I love about a 25? At most it hurts for 15 seconds. And even when it goes bad it only lasts 18 seconds. But that also means every second counts. There is a big level of pain difference between :15 and :16. I found that level today so I think that means I’m doing something right.
I have been solo this weekend. My husband shipped himself up to the Twin Cities along with his bicycle to send The Timmers off on his life sentence. Yes, he is getting married this summer and his bachelor party was today.
When I asked Chris if there would be strippers he said no, the to-be-married-man doesn’t like strippers. I almost dropped my fork at dinner when he said that. I asked him – why. He said the man does not believe you should pay a woman to take her clothes off. I almost dropped my knife. I’m just saying – you go to a bachelor party, there are strippers. This is not an optional addendum to the agenda. It’s on it. Non-negotiable.
Right?
What was on the agenda then? Riding their bicycles around the Twin Cities while wearing their Ragbrai jerseys. Imagine, then, 6 grown men riding bicycles when it’s 40 degrees outside each wearing a bright smurfy blue jersey with white hibiscus flowers sprinkled all over it. The point of the jersey was to be as ugly and obnoxious as possible. The point has been well taken for the past 6 years on Ragbrai. However, this is not appropriate bachelor party attire. How do I know? For my husband’s bachelor party they pulled the same trick up in Des Plaines (and really, where better to have your bachelor party than Des Plaines, Illinois). They rode their bikes around wearing their flowered jerseys with spandex shorts. When they arrived at the local strip club (which clearly has to parallel Big Earl’s in Ames, Iowa as far as strip club quality goes) – by bicycle – the bouncer said “no”. He would not let them in based on attire alone.
Know what? I don’t blame him.
I assume there will be some consumption of PBR and the Captain. I also assume that at some point someone will strip and it won’t be a girl. I’ve been on too many Ragbrais with those guys to expect they will make it through an entire evening drunk without running through a schoolyard naked.
I caught my husband almost shaving his legs last night before going to bed. He does this often – like most swimmers or cyclists – and it doesn’t bother me. But when I called him out on it – like, why? – he said “because this weekend there is cycling involved.” That kind of freaked me out a little. Ok, weekend away with the guys but no strippers AND you are shaving your legs? What kind of party is this?
When I reminded him that it would only be 40 in Minneapolis he put the clippers away and packed leg warmers instead.
In addition to swimming today I did a lot of spectating on the computer while everyone raced. Do you know how hard it is to track people online! My finger is strained from pressing REFRESH or FILTER over and over again. I’m going to need to work up to this because I have a feeling from here on out every weekend will be filled with racing. It was exciting to track everyone and made me itchy to race again. NOT itchy enough that I would ever race in 56 degree saltwater (ick) but itchy nonetheless. I was really happy to see that Marit not only had a killer return to racing but nabbed the Kona slot too. Good things come to those that wait. I know she waited a long time to recover and then race again. And knew when she finally raced again it would be like unleashing an animal.
I’m pretty sure RR qualified for Kona too and with Joy going….I’m starting to think I need to pull out my spectathlete hat and take me a Hawaiian vacation in October.
Hmmmm…..I wonder if I can talk Miss Daisy into going? Seriously someone should pay her and I to do commentary on the race out there. Forget Ironmnalive – ho hum. Blah blah bad music blah bad audio blah. After our Ironman Wisconsin adventure, we are like to pots of gold just waiting to be discovered. Give us a curb and bag of Bridge Mix and we’ll show you how to entertain hundreds for hours along the marathon course.
What is it about when a friend qualifies for Kona or does an Ironman you start to think: I NEED TO DO IRONMAN! Really I don’t. No you don’t either. But it does kind of kick you a little. It makes you want to consider it. Then I start considering the fact that you actually have to train for it and….yeah about that Ironman? I’m good.
Imagine in all of this excitement today I also fit in a trip to the dog park. Was it bring your beagle to the park day? There were so many beagles. And I’m telling you – there is an obesity epidemic among the beagles there. A fat beagle is NOT a cute beagle. Can’t these people see that? They end up laying in the middle of the park like a sad oversized bag of white fur rather than running and hunting. I don’t like seeing that. Boss of course dominated every dog he could find – Boston Terrier, flufferdog, Beagle. You name it he had the dog on its back and succumbing. To what? I don’t know. The reign and terror of a 9 pound dog? Really, small dogs are soft. If my killer Chihuahua can scare them they need to harden the f up and grow some big dog balls. Oh, you’re fixed? My bad.
Pretty soon I’m going to be on the prowl. For dessert. Is there an unwritten rule that if you have watched a race for more than 4 hours you get to eat cake like you have just raced for more than 4 hours? Can we talk about cake? Deirdre, back me up here. There is a real problem with the cake lately at Safeway. It is NOT good cake. What happened? It used to be fresh and sweet. Now it is crusty and dry. Not the same. I tried cupcakes last week but honestly wasn’t that impressed with a 3 dollar cupcake that I felt like I had to try them again. Ice cream always comes back the next day in a not so nice way so…I’m kind of feeling deserted by dessert. But I need some sugar and with husband away I can completely destroy the dessert in any way I like without hearing about it (you dug all of the peanut butter cups out of the ice cream!?! Why not just buy the peanut butter cups instead!! – because, it is NOT the same!!)
Tomorrow I need to be up early again. I’m heading down to the city to help out with Well-Fit’s March Madness cycling event. I’m also bringing my bike down there to do a long ride with the Moo group afterwards. I have not yet chosen a course to ride but I am thinking something terribly hilly just..because that is what we in Chicago do for fun when it is going to be 39 DEGREES AND SNOWING TOMORROW!
For real it is April 4th and you know what I did this morning? Put on my winter hat. IN MY HOUSE. Because it was 64 degrees inside when I woke up. I forget to turn the heat on. WHO has the heat on in APRIL!? I have ridden outside TWICE this year in Illinois and one of those times really didn’t count. I ran in shorts today even though it was 49 just because I have a rule that if you don’t need gloves you can probably wear shorts.
By the end of that run – I was cold.
It’s time to wrap this up. Tomorrow is a long day – city, cycling, and more spectating. Yes, a few more are racing NOLA tomorrow. Three things that made me NEVER want to do that race: high fecal count, alligators and point-to-point swim. That about does it for me. If I showed up to learn those things I would point-to-point myself in the direction of Bourbon Street and put a drink in my hand. If a gator wants to eat me, let him chase my drunk ass into some barely legal peep show. Not that I have any business being in there and furthermore if my husband is along it probably won’t even be ON the agenda.
I really don’t drink. And as a matter fact I don’t do anything illegal. I have the forms to prove that too. Did you know that an inhaler is a banned substance? I know that now and I am officially registered. You should also know that before I was registered I may have possessed the inhaler for a few days but…I did not inhale.
Seriously.
On that note, it’s time to inhale some cake. Or ice cream. Or whatever tonight’s flavor is. Cheers to all who raced today. I’m forking some cake for you. Know what would be a real nice way to thank me for shouthing at my computer screen all day to make you go faster?
(and clearly IT WORKED)
Join me.
